MY GIRLFRIEND HAS A NEW BOYFRIEND NOW.
The athletic type.
Not as tall as me. I look down at him.
He doesn't look at me.
Beside him I feel weedy.
He has black hair, cut very short all over, bristly.
Needs to shave every day already so doesn't, just to prove he could.
Wouldn't have thought he'd be her type.
Maybe it was me who wasn't but she didn't know till she tried.
Like with her clothes. She'd put something on, certain it was what she wanted, then decide it wasn't, put something else on that was quite different, and say it was exactly right.
Trial and error.
Nothing wrong with that.
The scientific approach.
She'd do the same with food.
We'd go somewhere—Mac's, Papa's Pizzas, KFC, wherever—buy what we wanted.
She'd take a bite or two of hers and then say she wished she'd chosen something else. I'd say 'What?' she'd say, 'What you've got,' and I'd say, 'Have mine, and I'll have yours.'
We'd swap and she'd be happy.
Got to the point where I'd always buy what I thought she'd like and suggest to her that she buy something I'd like. Very offhand, not, you know, assertive, or she wouldn't do it. I wouldn't say I'd like it, you understand, only suggest she might. She'd buy that, take a bite or two, say, 'I wish I'd chosen something else,' I'd say, 'Have mine,' and that would be that, both of us happy.
She never blamed me for suggesting she choose what she chose and then not wanting it. She's not like that at all, never tries to put the blame on the other person. She's good that way.
Never blames herself either.
Just gets on with it because that's the way life is.
I was sitting in the Happy Eater.
Don't like the Happy Eater much. Don't like it at all, to tell the truth. But my girlfriend's new boyfriend does. I've often seen him going in there.
They came in. She saw me. Waved. Smiled. No animosity between us. Didn't ever split up really. Not the way some do. Acrimoniously, if you know what I mean. She just said she wanted to go out with her new boyfriend, did I mind? I said she should do what she wanted, it was her choice. I knew she would anyway. Saying I minded wouldn't have stopped her.
She did and we haven't been out together since.
She brought him over to where I was sitting, at a table for four, no one else there. She sat opposite, he sat beside her.
They'd been to a football match, she said.
Not my sort of thing.
She was all fresh air and rosy cheeks.
Very my sort of thing.
Going on to a party at one of his mates. Birthday party, parents leaving them to it. Be a smash. She said he wanted to eat before they went. 'Get stoked up' is how she put it. Not her sort of talk usually.
He said nothing, just ate. French fries, pie, French fries. Lots of fries. Lovely manners. Chewed with his mouth open. Breathed through his mouth at the same time. You know what I mean.
Didn't look at me once.
She asked why I was at the Happy Eater, knowing I didn't like it. Said I felt like a change.
She asked what I was doing after. Said I was going to a movie.
Wasn't, just said it. She always liked going to movies. Just about her favourite thing. Holding hands. Always held hands. She liked holding hands, said it was the best part. Didn't matter whether the film was good or bad, what she liked was being in the dark, the warmth, being close together, and holding hands while watching the movie.
I like holding hands as well.
She also liked ice cream before the start. ('Wish I'd chosen yours.' 'Swap.')
She asked if I was going with anyone. I said no.
She wanted to know which movie. Said I'd make up my mind when I got there.
She didn't say anything after that.
Gave him a long look though.
He said nothing, except, 'Don't you want that?' meaning her food, which she'd only taken a bite or two of. She said, 'No, I wish I'd chosen something else.' He said, 'I'll have it, then,' and took it and ate it, head down, using his fork like a shovel, mouth open, breathing.
His hair really is very short. Not like mine, which is longish and thick. 'Nice,' she used to say, running her fingers through it. Could see his scalp through the bristles. Grey. I'd thought it would be nicely tanned like the rest of him, but it wasn't, it was grey. Like the skin of a lizard. Put me off my food, to be honest.
When he finished, he got up straightaway and they left.
She looked back at me from the door, and smiled.
When I thought it was about right, I walked to the cinema.
Stood in the foyer.
Studied what was showing on each of the five screens. Picked out the one I wanted to see and the one I'd suggest.
Don't think she fancies boys any more than I do.