During the residence of Altuna at Paris, instead of going to eat at a Troiteurs, he and I commonly ate in the neighborhood, almost opposite the cul-de-sac of the opera, at the house of a Madam la Selle, the wife of a tailor, who gave but very ordinary dinners, but whose table was much frequented on account of the safe company which generally resorted to it; no person was received without being introduced by one of those who used the house.The commander, de Graville, an old debauchee, with much wit and politeness, but obscene in conversation, lodged at the house, and brought to it a set of riotous and extravagant young men; officers in the guards and mousquetaires.The Commander de Nonant, chevalier to all the girls of the opera, was the daily oracle, who conveyed to us the news of this motley crew.M.du Plessis, a lieutenant-colonel, retired from the service, an old man of great goodness and wisdom; and M.Ancelet,*an officer in the mousquetaires kept the young people in a certain kind of order.This table was also frequented by commercial people, financiers and contractors, but extremely polite, and such as were distinguished amongst those of the same profession.M.de Besse, M.de Forcade, and others whose names I have forgotten, in short, well-dressed people of every description were seen there; except abbe's and men of the long robe, not one of whom I ever met in the house, and it was agreed not to introduce men of either of these professions.This table, sufficiently resorted to, was very cheerful without being noisy, and many of the guests were waggish, without descending to vulgarity.The old commander with all his smutty stories, with respect to the substance, never lost sight of the politeness of the old court; nor did any indecent expression, which even women would not have pardoned him, escape his lips.His manner served as a rule to every person at table; all the young men related their adventures of gallantry with equal grace and freedom, and these narratives were the more complete, as the seraglio was at the door; the entry which led to it was the same; for there was a communication between this and the shop of La Duchapt, a celebrated milliner, who at that time had several very pretty girls, with whom our young people went to chat before or after dinner.I should thus have amused myself as well as the rest, had I been less modest; Ihad only to go in as they did, but this I never had courage enough to do.With respect to Madam de Selle, I often went to eat at her house after the departure of Altuna.I learned a great number of amusing anecdotes and by degrees I adopted, thank God, not the morals, but the maxims I found to be established there.Honest men injured, husbands deceived, women seduced, secret accouchements, were the most ordinary topics, and he who had best filled the foundling hospital was always the most applauded.I caught the manners I daily had before my eyes: I formed my manner of thinking upon that Iobserved to be the reigning one amongst amiable, and upon the whole, very honest people.I said to myself, since it is the custom of the country, they who live here may adopt it; this is the expedient for which I sought.I cheerfully determined upon it without the least scruple, and the only one I had to overcome was that of Theresa, whom, with the greatest imaginable difficulty, I persuaded to adopt this only means of saving her honor.Her mother, who was moreover apprehensive of a new embarrassment by an increase of family, came to my aid, and she at length suffered herself to be prevailed upon.We made choice of a midwife, a safe and prudent woman, Mademoiselle Gouin, who lived at the Pointe Saint-Eustache, and when the time came, Theresa was conducted to her house by her mother.
* It was to this M.Ancelet I gave a little comedy, after my own manner entitled "Les Prisonniers de Guerre," (The Prisoners of War), which I wrote after the disasters of the French in Bavaria and Bohemia: I dared not either avow this comedy or show it, and this for the singular reason that neither the King of France nor the French were ever better spoken of nor praised with more sincerity of heart than in my piece; though written by a professed republican, I dared not declare myself the panegyrist of a nation, whose maxims were exactly the reverse of my own.More grieved at the misfortunes of France than the French themselves, I was afraid the public would construe into flattery and mean complaisance the marks of a sincere attachment, of which in my first part I have mentioned the date and the cause, and which I was ashamed to show.
I went thither several times to see her, and gave her a cipher which I had made double upon two cards; one of them was put into the linen of the child, and by the midwife deposited with the infant in the office of the foundling hospital according to the customary form.
The year following, a similar inconvenience was remedied by the same expedient, excepting the cipher, which was forgotten: no more reflection on my part, nor approbation on that of the mother; she obeyed with trembling.All the vicissitudes which this fatal conduct has produced in my manner of thinking, as well as in my destiny, will be successively seen.For the present, we will confine ourselves to this first period; its cruel and unforeseen consequences will but too frequently oblige me to refer to it.
I here mark that of my first acquaintance with Madam D'Epinay, whose name will frequently appear in these memoirs.She was a Mademoiselle D'Esclavelles, and had lately been married to M.D'Epinay, son to M.