书城外语飘(下)(纯爱·英文馆)
5609200000189

第189章

“Ashley,”said Melanie feebly and her fingers reached out to touch Scarlett's bowed head.Her thumb and forefinger tugged with no more strength than that of a baby at Scarlett's hair.Scarlett knew what that meant,knew Melanie wanted her to look up.But she could not,could not meet Melanie's eyes and read that knowledge in them.

“Ashley,”Melanie whispered again and Scarlett gripped herself.When she looked God in the face on the Day of Judgment and read her sentence in His eyes,it would not be as bad as this.Her soul cringed but she raised her head.

She saw only the same dark loving eyes,sunken and drowsy with death,the same tender mouth tiredly fighting pain for breath.No reproach was there,no accusation and no fear—only an anxiety that she might not find strength for words.

For a moment Scarlett was too stunned to even feel relief.Then,as she held Melanie's hand more closely,a flood of warm gratitude to God swept over her and,for the first time since her childhood,she said an humble unselfish prayer.

“Thank You,God.I know I'm not worth it but thank You for not letting her know.”

“What about Ashley,Melly?”

“You'll—look after him?”

“Oh,yes.”

“He catches cold—so easily.”

There was a pause.

“Look after—his business—you understand?”

“Yes,I understand.I will.”

She made a great effort.

“Ashley isn't—practical.”

Only death could have forced that disloyalty from Melanie.

“Look after him,Scarlett—but—don't ever let him know.”

“I'll look after him and the business too,and I'll never let him know.I'll just kind of suggest things to him.”

Melanie managed a small smile but it was a triumphant one as her eyes met Scarlett's again.Their glance sealed the bargain that the protection of Ashley Wilkes from a too harsh world was passing from one woman to another and that Ashley's masculine pride should never be humbled by this knowledge.

Now the struggle went out of the tired face as though with Scarlett's promise,ease had come to her.

“You're so smart—so brave—always been so good to me—”

At these words,the sob came freely to Scarlett's throat and she clapped her hand over her mouth.Now,she was going to bawl like a child and cry out:“I've been a devil!I've wronged you so!I never did anything for you!It was all for Ashley.”

She rose to her feet abruptly,sinking her teeth into her thumb to regain her control.Rhett's words came back to her again,“She loves you.Let that be your cross.”Well,the cross was heavier now.It was bad enough that she had tried by every art to take Ashley from her.But now it was worse that Melanie,who had trusted her blindly through life,was laying the same love and trust on her in death.No,she could not speak.She could not even say again:“Make an effort to live.”She must let her go easily,without a struggle,without tears,without sorrow.

The door opened slightly and Dr.Meade stood on the threshold,beckoning imperiously.Scarlett bent over the bed,choking back her tears and taking Melanie's hand,laid it against her cheek.

“Good night,”she said,and her voice was steadier than she thought it possibly could be.

“Promise me—”came the whisper,very softly now.

“Anything,darling.”

“Captain Butler—be kind to him.He—loves you so.”

“Rhett?”thought Scarlett,bewildered,and the words meant nothing to her.

“Yes,indeed,”she said automatically and,pressing a light kiss on the hand,laid it back on the bed.

“Tell the ladies to come in immediately,”whispered the doctor as she passed through the door.

Through blurred eyes she saw India and Pitty follow the doctor into the room,holding their skirts close to their sides to keep them from rustling.The door closed behind them and the house was still.Ashley was nowhere to be seen.Scarlett leaned her head against the wall,like a naughty child in a corner,and rubbed her aching throat.

Behind that door,Melanie was going and,with her,the strength upon which she had relied unknowingly for so many years.Why,oh,why,had she not realized before this how much she loved and needed Melanie?But who would have thought of small plain Melanie as a tower of strength?Melanie who was shy to tears before strangers,timid about raising her voice in an opinion of her own,fearful of the disapproval of old ladies,Melanie who lacked the courage to say Boo to a goose?And yet—

Scarlett's mind went back through the years to the still,hot noon at Tara when gray smoke curled above a blue-clad body and Melanie stood at the top of the stairs with Charles'saber in her hand.Scarlett remembered that she had thought at the time:“How silly!Melly couldn't even heft that sword!”But now she knew that had the necessity arisen,Melanie would have charged down those stairs and killed the Yankee—or been killed herself.

Yes,Melanie had been there that day with a sword in her small hand,ready to do battle for her.And now,as Scarlett looked sadly back,she realized that Melanie had always been there beside her with a sword in her hand,unobtrusive as her own shadow,loving her,fighting for her with blind passionate loyalty,fighting Yankees,fire,hunger,poverty,public opinion and even her beloved blood kin.

Scarlett felt her courage and self-confidence ooze from her as she realized that the sword which had flashed between her and the world was sheathed forever.

“Melly is the only woman friend I ever had,”she thought forlornly,“the only woman except Mother who really loved me.She's like Mother,too.Everyone who knew her has clung to her skirts.”

Suddenly it was as if Ellen were lying behind that closed door,leaving the world for a second time.Suddenly she was standing at Tara again with the world about her ears,desolate with the knowledge that she could not face life without the terrible strength of the weak,the gentle,the tender hearted.