"Oh, THIS ain't bully nor noth'n! Oh, no, I reckon not! Why, Biljy, it beats the Nonesuch, DON'T it?"The duke allowed it did.They pawed the yallerboys, and sifted them through their fingers and let them jingle down on the floor; and the king says:
"It ain't no use talkin'; bein' brothers to a rich dead man and representatives of furrin heirs that's got left is the line for you and me, Bilge.Thish yer comes of trust'n to Providence.It's the best way, in the long run.
I've tried 'em all, and ther' ain't no better way."Most everybody would a been satisfied with the pile, and took it on trust; but no, they must count it.So they counts it, and it comes out four hundred and fifteen dollars short.Says the king:
"Dern him, I wonder what he done with that four hundred and fifteen dollars?"They worried over that awhile, and ransacked all around for it.Then the duke says:
"Well, he was a pretty sick man, and likely he made a mistake -- I reckon that's the way of it.The best way's to let it go, and keep still about it.We can spare it.""Oh, shucks, yes, we can SPARE it.I don't k'yer noth'n 'bout that --it's the COUNT I'm thinkin' about.We want to be awful square and open and above-board here, you know.We want to lug this h-yer money up stairs and count it before everybody -- then ther' ain't noth'n suspicious.But when the dead man says ther's six thous'n dollars, you know, we don't want to --""Hold on," says the duke."Le's make up the deffisit," and he begun to haul out yaller-boys out of his pocket.
"It's a most amaz'n' good idea, duke -- you HAVE got a rattlin' clever head on you," says the king."Blest if the old Nonesuch ain't a heppin'
us out agin," and HE begun to haul out yaller-jackets and stack them up.
It most busted them, but they made up the six thousand clean and clear.
"Say," says the duke, "I got another idea.Le's go up stairs and count this money, and then take and GIVE IT TO THE GIRLS.""Good land, duke, lemme hug you! It's the most dazzling idea 'at ever a man struck.You have cert'nly got the most astonishin' head I ever see.
Oh, this is the boss dodge, ther' ain't no mistake 'bout it.Let 'em fetch along their suspicions now if they want to -- this 'll lay 'em out."When we got up-stairs everybody gethered around the table, and the king he counted it and stacked it up, three hundred dollars in a pile -- twenty elegant little piles.Everybody looked hungry at it, and licked their chops.
Then they raked it into the bag again, and I see the king begin to swell himself up for another speech.He says:
"Friends all, my poor brother that lays yonder has done generous by them that's left behind in the vale of sorrers.He has done generous by these yer poor little lambs that he loved and sheltered, and that's left fatherless and motherless.Yes, and we that knowed him knows that he would a done MORE generous by 'em if he hadn't ben afeard o' woundin' his dear William and me.Now, WOULDN'T he? Ther' ain't no question 'bout it in MYmind.Well, then, what kind o' brothers would it be that 'd stand in his way at sech a time? And what kind o' uncles would it be that 'd rob --yes, ROB -- sech poor sweet lambs as these 'at he loved so at sech a time?
If I know William -- and I THINK I do -- he -- well, I'll jest ask him."He turns around and begins to make a lot of signs to the duke with his hands, and the duke he looks at him stupid and leatherheaded a while; then all of a sudden he seems to catch his meaning, and jumps for the king, goo-gooing with all his might for joy, and hugs him about fifteen times before he lets up.Then the king says, "I knowed it; I reckon THAT 'll convince anybody the way HE feels about it.Here, Mary Jane, Susan, Joanner, take the money -- take it ALL.It's the gift of him that lays yonder, cold but joyful."Mary Jane she went for him, Susan and the hare-lip went for the duke, and then such another hugging and kissing I never see yet.And everybody crowded up with the tears in their eyes, and most shook the hands off of them frauds, saying all the time: