Expiation.
Notwithstanding the density of the crowd, M.de Villefort saw it open before him.There is something so awe-inspiring in great afflictions that even in the worst times the first emotion of a crowd has generally been to sympathize with the sufferer in a great catastrophe.Many people have been assassinated in a tumult, but even criminals have rarely been insulted during trial.Thus Villefort passed through the mass of spectators and officers of the Palais, and withdrew.Though he had acknowledged his guilt, he was protected by his grief.There are some situations which men understand by instinct, but which reason is powerless to explain; in such cases the greatest poet is he who gives utterance to the most natural and vehement outburst of sorrow.Those who hear the bitter cry are as much impressed as if they listened to an entire poem, and when the sufferer is sincere they are right in regarding his outburst as sublime.
It would be difficult to describe the state of stupor in which Villefort left the Palais.Every pulse beat with feverish excitement, every nerve was strained, every vein swollen, and every part of his body seemed to suffer distinctly from the rest, thus multiplying his agony a thousand-fold.He made his way along the corridors through force of habit; he threw aside his magisterial robe, not out of deference to etiquette, but because it was an unbearable burden, a veritable garb of Nessus, insatiate in torture.
Having staggered as far as the Rue Dauphine, he perceived his carriage, awoke his sleeping coachman by opening the door himself, threw himself on the cushions, and pointed towards the Faubourg Saint-Honore; the carriage drove on.
The weight of his fallen fortunes seemed suddenly to crush him; he could not foresee the consequences; he could not contemplate the future with the indifference of the hardened criminal who merely faces a contingency already familiar.
God was still in his heart."God," he murmured, not knowing what he said, -- "God -- God!" Behind the event that had overwhelmed him he saw the hand of God.The carriage rolled rapidly onward.Villefort, while turning restlessly on the cushions, felt something press against him.He put out his hand to remove the object; it was a fan which Madame de Villefort had left in the carriage; this fan awakened a recollection which darted through his mind like lightning.
He thought of his wife.
"Oh!" he exclaimed, as though a redhot iron were piercing his heart.During the last hour his own crime had alone been presented to his mind; now another object, not less terrible, suddenly presented itself.His wife! He had just acted the inexorable judge with her, he had condemned her to death, and she, crushed by remorse, struck with terror, covered with the shame inspired by the eloquence of his irreproachable virtue, -- she, a poor, weak woman, without help or the power of defending herself against his absolute and supreme will, -- she might at that very moment, perhaps, be preparing to die! An hour had elapsed since her condemnation; at that moment, doubtless, she was recalling all her crimes to her memory; she was asking pardon for her sins; perhaps she was even writing a letter imploring forgiveness from her virtuous husband -- a forgiveness she was purchasing with her death! Villefort again groaned with anguish and despair."Ah," he exclaimed, "that woman became criminal only from associating with me! I carried the infection of crime with me, and she has caught it as she would the typhus fever, the cholera, the plague! And yet Ihave punished her -- I have dared to tell her -- I have --`Repent and die!' But no, she must not die; she shall live, and with me.We will flee from Paris and go as far as the earth reaches.I told her of the scaffold; oh, heavens, Iforgot that it awaits me also! How could I pronounce that word? Yes, we will fly; I will confess all to her, -- I will tell her daily that I also have committed a crime! -- Oh, what an alliance -- the tiger and the serpent; worthy wife of such as I am! She must live that my infamy may diminish hers." And Villefort dashed open the window in front of the carriage.
"Faster, faster!" he cried, in a tone which electrified the coachman.The horses, impelled by fear, flew towards the house.
"Yes, yes," repeated Villefort, as he approached his home --"yes, that woman must live; she must repent, and educate my son, the sole survivor, with the exception of the indestructible old man, of the wreck of my house.She loves him; it was for his sake she has committed these crimes.We ought never to despair of softening the heart of a mother who loves her child.She will repent, and no one will know that she has been guilty.The events which have taken place in my house, though they now occupy the public mind, will be forgotten in time, or if, indeed, a few enemies should persist in remembering them, why then I will add them to my list of crimes.What will it signify if one, two, or three more are added? My wife and child shall escape from this gulf, carrying treasures with them; she will live and may yet be happy, since her child, in whom all her love is centred, will be with her.I shall have performed a good action, and my heart will be lighter." And the procureur breathed more freely than he had done for some time.
The carriage stopped at the door of the house.Villefort leaped out of the carriage, and saw that his servants were surprised at his early return; he could read no other expression on their features.Neither of them spoke to him;they merely stood aside to let him pass by, as usual, nothing more.As he passed by M.Noirtier's room, he perceived two figures through the half-open door; but he experienced no curiosity to know who was visiting his father: anxiety carried him on further.