书城外语曼斯菲尔德庄园(纯爱·英文馆)
5608800000100

第100章

Mrs Norris seemed as much delighted with the saving it would be to Sir Thomas,as with any part of it.‘Now William would be able to keep himself,which would make a vast difference to his uncle,for it was unknown how much he had cost his uncle;and indeed it would make some difference in her presents too.She was very glad that she had given William what she did at parting,very glad indeed that it had been in her power,without material inconvenience just at that time,to give him something rather considerable;that is,for her with her limited means,for now it would all be useful in helping to fit up his cabin.She knew he must be at some expense,that he would have many things to buy,though to be sure his father and mother would be able to put him in the way of getting everything very cheap-but she was very glad that she had contributed her mite towards it.’

‘I am glad you gave him something considerable,’said Lady Bertram,with most unsuspicious calmness-‘for I gave him only ā10.’

‘Indeed!’cried Mrs Norris,reddening.‘Upon my word,he must have gone off with his pockets well lined,and at no expense for his journey to London either!’

‘Sir Thomas told me ā10would be enough.’

Mrs Norris being not at all inclined to question its sufficiency,began to take the matter in another point.

‘It is amazing,’said she,‘how much young people cost their friends,what with bringing them up and putting them out in the world!They little think how much it comes to,or what their parents,or their uncles and aunts pay for them in the course of the year.Now,here are my sister Price's children;-take them all together,I dare say nobody would believe what a sum they cost Sir Thomas every year,to say nothing of what I do for them.’

‘Very true,sister,as you say.But,poor things,they cannot help it;and you know it makes very little difference to Sir Thomas.Fanny,William must not forget my shawl,if he goes to the East Indies;and I shall give him a commission for anything else that is worth having.I wish he may go to the East Indies,that I may have my shawl.I think I will have two shawls,Fanny.’

Fanny,meanwhile,speaking only when she could not help it,was very earnestly trying to understand what Mr and Miss Crawford were at.There was everything in the world against their being serious,but his words and manner.Everything natural,probable,reasonable was against it;all their habits and ways of thinking,and all her own demerits.-How could she have excited serious attachment in a man,who had seen so many,and been admired by so many,and flirted with so many,infinitely her superiors-who seemed so little open to serious impressions,even where pains had been taken to please him-who thought so slightly,so carelessly,so unfeelingly on all such points-who was everything to everybody,and seemed to find no one essential to him?-And further,how could it be supposed that his sister,with all her high and worldly notions of matrimony,would be forwarding anything of a serious nature in such a quarter?Nothing could be more unnatural in either.Fanny was ashamed of her own doubts.Everything might be possible rather than serious attachment or serious approbation of it toward her.She had quite convinced herself of this before Sir Thomas and Mr Crawford joined them.The difficulty was in maintaining the conviction quite so absolutely after Mr Crawford was in the room;for once or twice a look seemed forced on her which she did not know how to class among the common meaning;in any other man at least,she would have said that it meant something very earnest,very pointed.But she still tried to believe it no more than what he might often have expressed towards her cousins and fifty other women.

She thought he was wishing to speak to her unheard by the rest.She fancied he was trying for it the whole evening at intervals,whenever Sir Thomas was out of the room,or at all engaged with Mrs Norris,and she carefully refused him every opportunity.

At last-it seemed an at last to Fanny's nervousness,though not remarkably late,-he began to talk of going away;but the comfort of the sound was impaired by his turning to her the next moment,and saying,‘Have you nothing to send to Mary?No answer to her note?She will be disappointed if she receives nothing from you.Pray write to her,if it be only a line.’

‘Oh!yes,certainly,’cried Fanny,rising in haste,the haste of embarrassment and of wanting to get away-‘I will write directly.’

She went accordingly to the table,where she was in the habit of writing for her aunt,and prepared her materials without knowing what in the world to say!She had read Miss Crawford's note only once;and how to reply to anything so imperfectly understood was most distressing.Quite unpractised in such sort of note-writing,had there been time for scruples and fears as to style,she would have felt them in abundance;but something must be instantly written,and with only one decided feeling,that of wishing not to appear to think anything really intended,she wrote thus,in great trembling both of spirits and hand:

I am very much obliged to you,my dear Miss Crawford,for your kind congratulations,as far as they relate to my dearest William.The rest of your note I know means nothing;but I am so unequal to anything of the sort,that I hope you will excuse my begging you to take no further notice.I have seen too much of Mr Crawford not to understand his manners;if he understood me as well,he would,I dare say,behave differently.I do not know what I write,but it would be a great favour of you never to mention the subject again.With thanks for the honour of your note,

I remain,dear Miss Crawford,etc.etc.

The conclusion was scarcely intelligible from increasing fright,for she found that Mr Crawford,under pretence of receiving the note,was coming towards her.